I had an unconventional childhood and adult life.  I eat only what grows in my shower, and throw away only old toenails that don’t degrade in my wonderful compost heap.  But for the rest of you, for shame, for shame.  Occasionally covered by the news, The Great Eastern Garbage Patch is a legacy that future Waterworld-esque generations will live upon.  (Counterpoint: Global Warming — Mr. Andrew Schlafly, you’re the greatest.)

Learn more about what terrible people we are:

Righ’ Chere,

Also Heres,

Also The Game (you lose)

I have the urge to put my tax refund into 7up, Mr. and Mrs. T’s Bloody Mary Mix, and Doll Heads.